Never Left The Garage

半夜睡不著，去兜個風順便看你一下
沒事，晚餐喝的酒都退了
結果在車庫門口就
呃，閘門壞了
警察來了
靠
好帥

沒有沒有，不是啦，有啊，有想你啊！
醬，先掰囉。愛你喔！

Couldn’t sleep.
Thought I might come see you.
No,
I didn’t drink at dinner.
Well—
uh...

Okay.
A little.

I’m fine.
I’m completely sober.

Eleven forty-seven,
room was way too quiet.
Checked my phone,
turned it face down,
picked it up again.

Jacket on,
keys in hand,
elevator going down.

Nothing serious,
just going out
to get some air around town.

I don’t miss you,
I just couldn’t sleep.

I’m not drunk,
I’m just walking kind of—

Hey.

I’m fine.

Thought I might come see you,
you’re really not that far.

Get some air,
maybe see your face,
then head back to my car.

I don’t miss you that much,
nothing here is out of hand.

I’m completely sober.

I never even
left the garage.

Never left the garage,
never left the garage.

Just backing up—
what could possibly go wrong?

Never left the garage,
never left the garage.

Beep—
BANG.

Fuck.

It’s not that bad.
Just the exit gate.

Honestly,
it looked a little fragile anyway.

The building guy came over,
looked at me,
then looked at the car.

Didn’t say a word,
just pulled his phone out.

I said,
“We don’t need that,
do we?”

He said,
“Sir,
I already called the police.”

Oh.

Right.

Guess I won’t come see you.
Turns out I’m a little busy.

Don’t need air.
The basement’s actually
pretty breezy.

Nothing serious,
really nothing out of hand.

I’m completely sober.

It’s just the exit
doesn’t work now.

The police are here.

...

Fuck.

He’s hot.

No—
I mean—

Good evening, officer.

Yes.
That’s my car.

Yes.
I was driving.

Yes.
I hit it.

Did I drink?

A little.

At dinner.

Hours ago.

...

Right.

Of course.

I’ll cooperate.

“Sir, I need you
to come give a statement.”

Sure.

Absolutely.

I mean—

Of course.

Guess I won’t come see you.
You’re really not that far.

Maybe some other night,
when I can actually
leave with the car.

I don’t miss you that much.
Nothing here is out of hand.

Just wanted to go see you,

and I never even
left the garage.

Gate’s broken.

Car’s scratched.

Building guy’s still staring.

...

Officer’s really hot, though.

Fuck.

Should’ve walked.
--------
Lyrics: Christopher R