(24歲) But her

我早就知道你的小把戲了
但這樣的心痛 我也好久沒經歷到了
以為我會變得理性
但在12年來回拉扯後
你終究還是我的死穴啊

我的朋友 他們說你交新對象了
不是任何女生 就是她
我感受到自己的恐懼
因為她也許就是你的餘生了
畢竟她擁有我給不了你的平凡

你昨晚打來了電話
另一頭的你聽起來非常篤定
你說 你放棄我們了 你不想再奮鬥了

很痛 很痛
你打破了我們的約定 牽起了她
我明明就還在這裡堅持著
你要我怎麼用這種心態好好活著呢
很痛 很痛
當你擁有她的身體 跟我的心
你被幻覺淹沒 被預設蠱惑
我還曾出現在你腦中嗎？

你呀 你不是認真的吧
你是第一個給我家的感覺的人
你把我推開 但你不知道俗話說的
「家就是心之所在」嗎？
我呀 我也知道自己很可悲
緊抓著一個你已經遺棄的東西
說我傻 說我笨
但別說我愚蠢
畢竟你明明還留下了這麼多線索

週五的夜晚 你正在為她點蠟燭吧
而我也感受到自己慢慢淡出你的世界了

很痛 很痛
你打破了我們的約定 牽起了她
我明明就還在這裡堅持著
你要我怎麼用這種心態好好活著呢
很痛 很痛
當你擁有她的身體 跟我的心
你被幻覺淹沒 被預設蠱惑
我還曾出現在你腦中嗎？
很痛 很痛
好似你們倆正在等我離開一樣
因為你們知道我的存在
正是阻礙你們最大的原因
很痛 很痛
我到底該相信什麼呢
我無法拼湊出完整的拼圖
但你還是會想起我的吧
會的吧 我是對的吧

I knew your little games
But it’s been a while
Since this kind of heartbreak
Thought I’d be more rational
Twelve years of tug of war
You’re my weak spot after all
My friends, they told me you got a new girl
Not just anyone but her
The fear of mine knowing she might be the one
‘Cause she’s got everything I couldn’t give
You called last night
Sounded so firm on the other side
Saying you, you gave us up
That you fought enough
And it hurts
You broke our promise and held her hand
Now tell me how could I possibly live with that
When I’m still here trying to fight?
And it hurts
When you took her body and my heart
You drown in illusions
And trust your assumptions
But do I still cross your mind?
You, tell me you’re not serious
You gave me the picture of home
You pushed me away
But don’t you know what they say
That home is where your heart is
I, I know it’s pathetic
To be holding on what you left
Call me dumb, call me stupid
But don’t call me foolish
‘Cause you left the breadcrumbs behind
It’s Friday night
And you’re putting on candlelights
And I feel myself fading out of your life
And it hurts
You broke our promise and held her hand
Now tell me how could I possibly live with that
When I’m still here trying to fight?
And it hurts
When you took her body and my heart
You drown in illusions
And trust your assumptions
But do I still cross your mind?
And it hurts
Like you’re waiting for me to be gone
‘Cause you knew my existence was the only thing
That stopped you two carrying on
And it hurts
What to believe, what to not?
The pieces of puzzle I couldn’t add up
I still do cross your mind
Tell me I’m right
Tell me I’m right