我渴望的 All I Ever Wanted (Original Guitar Memo 6/22)

相遇那天
你問了「你理想中的愛是什麼樣子？」
我回了你「一個家」

我跟你敘述了我的原生家庭
也分享了路上的老夫老妻還能手牽手走著
總讓我妒忌

你曾說我在經過的那些爛事之後
我值得你所有的愛
現在你說我就是妄想症：
「你他媽又想溝通什麼了？」

我一直想要的
只是睡前耍廢抱在一起
感受你右腿在我膝蓋上的重量
在晚上十點十分 吃著炸雞看摩登家庭
但你想要擁有更多來掩飾你的自卑
因此為了自尊及社會的期望
你最終拋下了唯一擁有過真實的東西 我

6/22 你在外討著關注來滿足你的自大
我卻一個人守在家
你有閃過一絲我的念頭嗎？
我明明就坐在窗台等著一則
你連傳送都不願意的訊息

你說我太大驚小怪了
但我明明在說實話 對吧？
「我都在你身邊了 你到底還想要我怎樣？」

我一直想要的
只是睡前耍廢抱在一起
感受你右腿在我膝蓋上的重量
在晚上十點十分 吃著炸雞看摩登家庭
但你想要擁有更多來掩飾你的自卑
因此為了自尊及社會的期望
你最終拋下了唯一擁有過真實的東西 我

看你長成一個男人 不是我的職責了
我沒辦法把你變成你成為不了的角色
我也慶幸那個生命沒有來到家裡
你看看我爸對我做了什麼
又看看你已經對我做了什麼

我一直想要的
只是睡前耍廢抱在一起
感受你右腿在我膝蓋上的重量
在晚上十點十分 吃著炸雞看摩登家庭
但你想要擁有更多來掩飾你的自卑
因此為了自尊及社會的期望
你最終拋下了唯一擁有過真實的東西 我

我一直想要的只是你答應給我的家

On the day we met
You asked about ‘what’s your ideal kind of love’
And I replied, ‘a home’

I told you ‘bout my family
And how I envy the old couples in the streets
Walking hand in hand

You said I deserve all your love
After going through all the shit
Now you said I’m just delusional
‘What the fuck you want to talk about again’

All I ever wanted
Was cuddling in bed with your right leg on my knee
Getting fried chicken, 10 after 10 watching Modern Family
But you wanted more to cover up all that inferiority
So you settled for the world by throwing away your only real thing, me

Twenty-second of June
You’re out getting attention to fill your arrogance
And I’m left alone

Did I ever cross your mind?
When I’m sitting by the window waiting for a text
That you didn’t even bother to send

You said I’m being dramatic
Saying words that spoke the truth
‘Am I not already next to you?’
‘What the hell am I supposed to do?’

All I ever wanted
Was cuddling in bed with your right leg on my knee
Getting fried chicken, 10 after 10 watching Modern Family
But you wanted more to cover up all that inferiority
So you settled for the world by throwing away your only real thing, me

(All I ever wanted)
(You threw me away, threw me away, oh)

It’s not my duty
To watch you grow up into a man
I can’t turn you into something you’re not
And I’m glad the baby
Didn’t come into this family
Look what my dad did to me
And look what you’ve already done to me

When all I ever wanted
Was cuddling in bed with your right leg on my knee
Getting fried chicken, 10 after 10 watching Modern Family
But you wanted more to cover up all that inferiority
So you settled for the world by throwing away your only real thing, me

(Was cuddling in bed with your right leg on my knee)
(10 after 10 watching Modern Family)

All I ever wanted was the home you promised me